Action Figures & Their Beers -- Generally Speaking

by Beedo Sookcool
on 2025-11-19, 05:30:46

SANDFORD ORCHARDS' VINTAGE THE GENERAL

For some reason, most probably because of accidental copyright lapse, Mattel was unable to call the Masters of the Universe Snake Men character Rattlor . . . well, Rattlor . . . when it was time to release his action figure in 2003 for the New Millennium MOTU brand relaunch, so he had to be called “The General” on his packaging. Well, I already used that particular figure for my review of Cornish Rattler cider, so here’s the 2012 MOTU Classics version of Rattlor in his 2003-style General’s armour:

I have a tendency to “tweak” my figures if I find them to have minor flaws, and such was the case with MOTU Classics Rattlor. The rattle at the end of his tail was done in the same colour as the rest of him, so I undercoated with dark brown and top-coated with ivory, for a more realistic-looking rattle. For some reason, his eyes were done with horizontally-oriented, red slit pupils looking backwards, so I repainted his eyes with vertical black pupils, so that he’s looking forward. And then added The General armour that was thoughtfully included in the 2013 “End of Wars” Weapons Pak.

“Cider Done Right,” says the smooth sticker on the neck of the bottle. Sandford Orchards 2022 Vintage The General is described as a “mighty vat-aged cider.” Well, at 8.4% ABV, it certainly has more potency than the average bottle of brew on supermarket shelves! Made from 100% Devonshire apples, the main label claims they “mature this cider the longest, in our largest and oldest oak vat.” Very handily, the (nasty-feeling, sandpapery) main label has a lot of info on it. For example, it also tells us that this cider falls half-way between Medium and Sweet, that it contains Yarlington Mill, Dabinett, and Tremlett’s Bitter apple cultivars, and pairs well with gamey meats and Sunday roasts. And it contains sulphites (enh).

Also also, we are told “Making Devon cider great since 2002. The General is the name of our mighty, oak vat in which only our best vintage ciders are aged. It is bold and satisfying with notes of Seville orange, plum, and baked apple, rich and rewarding with a long warming finish.” Well, that’s what their promotional copy says, anyway. As for what an impartial imbiber thinks . . . .

Yeah, this is gooooooooood! It’s sweeter than most English ciders, but not quite on par with, say, Woodchuck Amber. It’s also not as apple-y and fruity as Woodchuck Amber, either. It’s mild, mellow, and sweet. And the sulphites, while present, aren’t as in-your-face as with most British ciders. Add to that its potency, and you’ve got a deceptively powerful tipple that strikes suddenly and hits hard – just like General Rattlor. And it's just plain delicious!

Drink this if you also like: Sweet drinks, sweet cider, strong cider.